1. He runs the garbage disposal for too long.
2. He over salts. But, in his defense, I under salt. I grew up being told salt was evil.
3. He recently (about 5 minutes ago) tickled me until I almost peed (he knew I had to go) then chased me all the way into the bathroom and shoved his wang in my face while I was peeing. Geez Louise.
4. He pauses the tv when I talk (but I guess I should stop talking while he's watching tv)
5. He's perfect. Why does he have to be so perfect?